In a small town lies Kaijo High School, but our story no longer takes place there. In the city of Tokuko, five hours from Kaijo, 4 old friends, who were a part of their high school culture club, alongside some new faces, embark on the next stages of their lives, and this is their story...
Kaijo. October 19th
Lizzy: Mind if I join you?
Kieran: Be my guest
Lizzy takes a seat down next to Kieran
Kieran: Vodka?
Lizzy: Sure why not
Lizzy takes the bottle from his hand and takes a swig
Lizzy: Damn that's strong
Kieran: I need it
Lizzy: You good for us to talk?
Kieran: Saying no isn't an option is it?
Lizzy: Actually, for once it is
Kieran: Oh
Lizzy: But I'm here right now, and by saying no, you'd be passing up your opportunity to unload, and sitting here right now, in our old club room, with a bottle of vodka, I think this is the perfect opportunity don't you?
Kieran: I don't know where to start
Lizzy: I do. I went to your hotel room
Kieran: Oh
Lizzy: Kieran, your mum died, I'm so sorry
Kieran looks down
Lizzy: Why didn't you say anything?
Kieran: It was sudden. I got a call one night saying that I needed to get down there and I ran. I only told the principal what was happening because I had to. She died the next day. I didn't even get a chance to process what was happening before she was gone
Lizzy: So you ended up in Kaijo
Kieran: I didn't want to stay in Hanabu, it was too close to everything, but Kaijo, had so many great memories, I felt safer being here
Lizzy: How come you didn't come back?
Kieran: I was going to. I checked in to the hotel for a few nights, and I was planning to come back. I didn't want to be at the funeral
Lizzy: Why not?
Kieran: It was bad enough I had to see him in the hospital, holding my mom's hand, acting like a poor, devastated husband, while my stomach went round in knots being next to the person that beat me for years, I couldn't do it all again at the funeral. I was just planning to come down after the funeral and pay my respects
Lizzy: So what changed?
Kieran: Kaylin
Lizzy: Your girlfriend?
Kieran: Yeah. She said I had to go, that I would only be damaging myself but taking away that opportunity to say goodbye
Lizzy: I kinda see where she's coming from
Kieran: I didn't want to be on my own though, I knew that I wouldn't be strong enough to deal with him and family friends. If they tried to make me feel guilty for being gone, I knew I'd crumble. So she promised me she would come with me, hold my hand and support me
Lizzy: That's sweet
Kieran: It was. Until she bailed on me. She sat and watched me tell people I was coming to the funeral, and then next thing I knew, she was swept up with work and couldn't stay with me anymore.
Lizzy: So you went alone?
Kieran: I had to. I'd told people I was going, I couldn't back out by that point. Everything that I was afraid of happing there, happened. My dad raised all the sympathy from everyone, while they all looked at me with disdain. I hate to stand beside him and play the role of the grieving son with his equally devastated dad. As people paid their respects to us, all I got was "Why would you leave your parents like that", "Why did you cause them so much stress by moving out while you were still at high school?", "How could you not visit them even once, your own parents" On and on it went, every single one made me feel like shit while my dad took in all the sympathy
Lizzy: Kieran, I...
Kieran: And then it started. "You're not going to leave your dad to sort all this mess out alone are you?" or "I expect that you're staying in the area to help him with her estate", "You're on school holidays yes? So you have plenty of time to help your poor father". What could I say, I was already being treated like the demon son. I didn't want to go, let alone on my own as I knew that I wouldn't be able to answer those questions honestly. All I could say was that I was staying with him to help
Lizzy: And that's why you haven't come back
Kieran: It was hell. He started drinking, heavily, and every conversation turned into an argument. It was the same every day, we tried to deal with mom's estate and he argued with me at every turn, even during meetings with lawyers. I can't forget the violence either, he didn't take long to fall back into old habits. I allowed myself to be hit, kicked, punched, whacked. Glasses thrown at me, hit on the back with a chair, boiling water poured on my hand. He went for every possible form of attack because he's an angry, bitter drunk and I took it all because I didn't know what else to do.
Lizzy: That's not ok
Kieran: Before I knew it, it was September. Nothing had moved with mom's estate, I was covered in injuries. I couldn't go back to work, so I took leave, indefinitely, while I tried to navigate this mess. Nothing changed, I barely remember last month it was all a blur. Everything's gone so wrong again
Lizzy: We need to talk about Yazzy, Kieran. What you said to her wasn't ok
Kieran: I know
Lizzy: Why? Why did you shout at her like that? She's the nicest person we've ever known, she's done nothing except support you, throughout everything. Even after your break up
Kieran: I feel awful
Lizzy: She made the decision to come and see you, no one else, she wanted to be there for you and you shot her down like that
Kieran: I don't have an excuse
Lizzy: I want to know why though
Kieran: I hadn't seen Kaylin since July, since before the funeral. She was keeping me at a distance and I was alone. She had made me feel like I was safest with her, that I only needed her, and then she wasn't there, and I was spiralling. It had been a shit day when Yazzy came, I'd taken another hit from him and I was exhausted. Suddenly, she's at my door. I panicked. I didn't want her to see me the way I was. I couldn't cope with that, having that conversation, alongside everything else. I tried to get her to leave, I couldn't. She wouldn't go. She was being stubborn and any other time I would have appreciated it, but that day, I needed to hide, I needed to be alone and so I snapped. I shouted through the door, I spoke to her in a way I've never spoken to her before, and it crushed me.
Kieran and Lizzy sit in silence for a while, as both process the conversation. Kieran takes another swig of vodka and looks around the former club room
Kieran: I miss these days
Lizzy: Me too
Kieran: Everything was so much easier back then
Lizzy: All we had to worry about was what we were doing that evening
Kieran: Or in my case, when I could next expect a beating from you
Lizzy: I never failed to disappoint I hope
Kieran: Never
Lizzy: Running the club was the best thing I ever did. I'd give anything to go back to that time, but I'd want Katie with me.
Kieran: When did life get like this?
Lizzy: Kier, it was always like this
Kieran: Lizzy, I'm in trouble
Lizzy: What's happened?
Kieran takes in a gulp of air. He shifts a bit in his sitting position
Kieran: It turns out that Kaylin....Kaylin was....she'd been lying to me. I thought that we had something special and serious but I was wrong. I was one of many relationships that she was juggling
Lizzy: What?
Kieran: She was in no less than six relationships
Lizzy: 6? I can't even get one and she's out there getting 6
Kieran: Tori and Delia were two of them
Lizzy: The fuck?
Kieran: Yeah, I know
Lizzy: That's rough buddy
Kieran: This was all last week. My whole relationship, all the stability that was remaining, was just gone like that.
Lizzy: At least you know now and you're away from her
Kieran: She left me two bombshells before she went
Lizzy: Oh?
Kieran: First was that she was suffering from an STD and that I might have it. Luckily, I didn't
Lizzy: Win for you
Kieran: The second thing.....she's pregnant
Lizzy sits shocked, frozen. Kieran senses her disbelief and hands her the vodka bottle from which she takes a large swig
Lizzy: Sorry but you....a dad?
Kieran: I'm going out of my mind here
Lizzy: You sure it's yours?
Kieran: There's no doubt apparently. Out of her 6 relationships, I was the only male, so by proxy the only one capable of you know....
Lizzy: Ewwww
Kieran: What am I going to do?
Lizzy: Demand a paternity test, you can't take her word that you're the father, when she was lying to you about everything else
Kieran: True
Lizzy: When are you coming back home Kieran? You quit your job and everything
Kieran: I can't go back. I can't do it anymore. I'm tired. I'm so tired. I can't face the world anymore
Lizzy: You loved your job
Kieran: I did, but nothing matters anymore, except my potential child, but am I ready to be a dad? Am I even capable?
Lizzy: You should find out first if it's even yours
Kieran: Oh god, I'm so screwed
Kieran takes the vodka back
Lizzy: Why did you come here? And how?
Kieran: I know the groundskeeper, so it was easy. As for why? Uh....
Kieran pauses and looks around
Kieran: I guess because this is the only security I've ever known. I was most happiest when I was here, these four walls, it's like nothing else matters
Lizzy: You can't hide here forever though, no matter how safe it may be
Kieran: I don't know....I could fall asleep here and never wake up and I'd be ok with that
Lizzy slaps Kieran
Lizzy: Don't ever say that again
Kieran: Lizzy....
Kieran holds his swelling cheek and notices the tears forming in Lizzy's eyes, as they form in his own eyes as well
Lizzy: Don't ever say that again. You might be ok with it but I wouldn't be, neither would Yazzy, Tori, Katie, Delia. What about our colleagues? Michi, CC, Alex? The kids? Would they be ok with it? No they wouldn't. It would break them. They'd never recover
Kieran: I can't do it anymore
Lizzy: Yes, yes you can. You can do it and you will. Even if I have to drag your ass through this life, you will do it
Kieran: How?
Lizzy: Because you have friends. Friends that care about you. Fuck your dad, fuck Kaylin, fuck everyone that stands against you. Stand with the people that care for you. Look, if Yazzy can still stand by you after it all, then you're not lost
Kieran: I never told you the real reason she and I split did I?
Lizzy: You moved across country when she asked you not to right?
Kieran: It was more than that. It was to do with Ash
Lizzy: Look no one blames you for still caring about her, she was the love of your life and she died, of course you're always going to feel for her
Kieran: She was the reason things ended between me and Yazzy, the reason I left and took a job on the other side of the country
Lizzy: She got pissed with you for still caring about Ash
Kieran: No
Lizzy: Then what?
Kieran: I lied about something between Ash and I
Lizzy: What could you have lied about? You two were the most open book we've ever met. Your relationship basically played out in this club room
Kieran: Not all of it
Lizzy: Then what happened?
Kieran: I didn't lose my virginity at university like you all thought
Lizzy: You didn't....
Kieran: It felt like the right time, it was Christmas, our senior year, everything seemed perfect, everything felt right. So we took that step, and it was everything we thought it would be
Lizzy: You never said anything?
Kieran: We didn't want to. We didn't want to share it, it was between us and it was something private, something personal
Lizzy: .....
Kieran: I also didn't want to be killed by you
Lizzy: Yeah, I would have done that
Kieran: That's what I told Yazzy, that's why we argued, that's why I left
Lizzy: How come?
Kieran: I lied Lizzy, I had kept that information secret. Yazzy and I slept together for the first time with her believing that I was a virgin, that we were in it together, but I knew all along I wasn't, and I let her believe that. I only told her afterwards
Lizzy: That's a lot to take in I guess
Kieran: If only I'd told her the whole truth
Lizzy: Kieran....
Kieran: I'm going to tell you something, that I've never told anyone, not even Yazzy
Lizzy: You're scaring me here
Kieran: Ash was pregnant when she died
Lizzy is at a loss for words, completely floundered. This was the last thing she expected to hear
Kieran: Say something, please...
Lizzy: You knocked her up huh? Was it that Christmas then?
Kieran: Yeah...she was about three months pregnant. We'd just had our first scan and everything. We were so excited. We were even planning to get married. I had never felt happier. I didn't care that I was 18 and about to be a dad, I had her and everything felt like it would be ok
Lizzy: And then she died
Kieran: This is why I've always struggled with her death, because of everything before hand
Lizzy: Oh Kieran
She puts her arm around his and he rests his head on her
Lizzy: We'll get you through this
Kieran: Can we just stay here tonight?
Lizzy: Sure